In accordance with this year's aim # 9 (reading books about things I am interested in), I am posting a book review about a book I just finished. How We Love by Milan and Kay Yerkovich.
I first found out about this book by listening to the New Life Live podcast. This is a podcast where callers call in and get counsel on situations that they are going through. They usually get right to the gut of the issue and give callers some next steps. There are different speakers on the show including Steve Arteburn, Henry Cloud, John Townsend, and Milan Yerkovich. They have all authored book and they typically send callers several free books after the help them.They send How We Love a lot so I wanted to find out about it! This is another regular one they send and I highly recommend it.
How we Love is written from a Christian perspective, but it is based on the counseling theory of attachment. John Bowlby was the first attachment theorist. Bowlby believed that the earliest bonds formed by children and their primary caregivers have a large impact on them. This impact then continues throughout adult life. Yerkovich's book looks at how these bonds then play into marraiage when two partners come into marriage with the bonds that they formed in early childhood.
The book will help you look into your own heart and see that type of imprint that you have on your heart from your growing up. The book makes it clear that this is not to blame or to excuse what happened, but simply to bring further understanding. By understanding you will be able to see how your love style impacts your mate and vice versa.
I personally have been able to see that I have two primary imprints on my heart. I can see how there is both negative and positive to my imprint style. The best part of the book is that there is a workbook in the back of the book that helps you work on ways to further connect with your mate.
They have another book coming out called, "How We Love our Children" and I can't wait to read it!
Has anyone read this book too?
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