So I have been wanting to read this book for quite some time, circa summer 2010. :) Husband bought it for me over Thanksgiving in Dallas and just got to it mid-february and recently finished the book.
There are a series of "Every" books, like . . . Every Man's Marriage, Every Man's Battle, Every Young Man's Battle and on and on. I was particularly enthralled with the idea of this book because it focused only the woman's part in marriage. The book isn't how to get your husband to change or a series of how to manipulate for what you want, but the book sets forth scriptural principles for a woman's part in a marriage. Nearly two years in to this thing called MAWAGE (princess bride reference) I am trying to learn all I can for myself and to share with others.
Here is what I loved about the book:
1. The author, Shannon Ethridge, is incredibly authentic in her writing with the struggles that her and her husband have. In some of the examples her husband Greg shares how some of her actions made him feel. She also had input from other couples. The authenticity wasn't used for authenticity sake, but it truly helped me to see their struggles, how they were growing, and what it looks like to use that struggle as something to pull the marriage together rather than apart for the glory of the Lord.
2. Selflessness. Boom. (translation for boom = impactful) There was an overall tone of the book that focused on the aspect of being selfless in marriage and putting your husbands needs before your own. She had practical examples and scriptural examples of this. Humbling.
3. I love little acronyms that help you remember helpful terms or even stuff for your marriage. She had a new one for me. Cut each other some SLACK. The was termed by Randy Fujishin. It is the formula for constructive conflict resolution. So this is what it means.
Sit down together, in a focused conversation
Listen with a desire to understand the nature of the problem at hand
Ask non-offensive questions to clarify your perceptions of you mate's concerns
Compromise and find a solution that both mates can feel good about
Kiss or an expression of affection, affirming you continued commitment to the relationship
4. If I am honest, on a good day I can say that I am "struggling well" with control. I'd say one of the biggest eye openers in marriage is that doing something a different way isn't always a bad or wrong way. In fact -- it may be a better way or a more . . . dare I say God-honoring or creative way. I'm speaking in generalities, but I can struggle with thinking I am right and then out of that wanting to control, God has done a lot of work on me in that area, but her book was a great refresher course on this topic.
Conclusions: So I would say read this book, you would definitely gain some sound practical counsel on the woman's part in marriage. While the book is on point scripturally, she is definitely not setting forth a theological structure for marriage-- so if you want that, read another book.
